[warm upbeat music] [warm hopeful music] - Nobody likes hearing [warm hopeful music] that their parent is in prison.

First, you have this thing, and it's you're worrying [warm hopeful music] if they're okay or not.

Then it's like, when are they gonna be home?

And then it's like, why did this happen?

[warm hopeful music] And it's just so many emotions going through your head.

- Some people just think, [warm hopeful music] just because they're in a bad place, and they did a bad thing, they can't change.

It's not right.

Even though she's in jail, [warm hopeful music] a bad place, that don't mean she'll be a bad person.

- [Kid] Say if I had the option to get one billion dollars, [warm hopeful music] or see my dad one more last time, I would see my dad one more last time.

A lot of kids go through this every day.

[warm hopeful music] And so do I.

[no audio] [warm orchestral music] [warm orchestral music] [no audio] [no audio] [birds chirping] [footsteps tap] - [Kid] Oh man, this.

[kid singing indistinct] [birds chirping] - Oh, ah!

[kids clapping hands] - Yeah.

Oh yeah.

- Oh, nah, you can't- [Draylin speaking indistinct] [Draylin squeaks] [birds chirping] - This my little cousin, [ball tapping] Draylin.

Draylin, you know, he my main man right here, my main man.

[birds chirping] We like to play video games, and we come outside a lot on the trampoline.

We'll go play basketball with my big brother.

[birds chirping] You know that jail that my mom is in right now?

She said I was born in there.

That's why a lot of people there know me at the prison [birds chirping] she's at right now.

Even though she didn't grew up with me, and take care of me, she still love me.

She's a sweet, kind, nice person [birds chirping] if you really get to know her.

[water sloshing] [bottle taps] Some of my friends ask me, who you live with?

I say, my aunt, and my grandma, or my other family members.

[clicks tongue] And then they don't ask no more questions to me.

[birds chirping] Mameh is my grandma.

Now, she's the one that took care of the whole family.

Without Mameh, I don't know if I would even be here right now.

She holded up the family when we were down, now, it's our turn to take care of her.

Same for Nicey.

She takes care of everybody, literally everybody.

Everybody.

She's got the house controllings, paying the bills, she's taking care of us.

Gone through some hard time, but she made it better.

- All right.

'Cause it's not like I just get them up, and get them ready, and say, okay, do yourself, it's everything that you have to be concerned about, you know?

'Cause it's the love, the emotion that you're putting into something.

He's already been forced to deal with the fact that she's not here, the fact that his father's not in his life, you know what I'm saying?

And he's been waiting for those people to come back, and to stay steady, and they haven't done it yet, so.

[ball thumping] By the time she gets home, he'll already be 11 years old.

Oh, I know she wants to get back into that mother role, and back into his life.

[sniffs] It's so hard, [ball thumping] you know, because you step up in a, look, a role, and you know you're not, I'm not aunt, but I stepped up in the mother role, so it's a little different, you know?

And to say that I now have to take him, and put him in the hands of somebody else, and wouldn't even know it's his mom, and trust that that person is gonna really take care of him?

It's a hard thing to think about.

I'm okay, I will, if they decide that's what they wanna do, but it's, that's not that easy to make that decision.

[gentle hopeful music] - It's really hard to choose, 'cause I grew up in that house, but at the same time, I know my mom's gonna want me to live with her.

[gentle hopeful music] But it's like, not her choice, it's my choice - And I'm just here to help him.

I'm right here.

I got him.

No matter what, I got him.

[gentle hopeful music] [gentle hopeful music] [no audio] [eggs rustling] [egg tapping] [egg cracking] [eggshell rustles] - Here you go.

If you like, ask me how my life is without a father, I would say it's kind of tough, because it's hard without my dad around.

[utensil tapping] Especially my mom, 'cause she had to play both parts of mom and dad, which is tough for her, for seven years.

[utensil tapping] Smells really good.

- You made them.

- Yeah.

[utensil tapping] Thank you.

[fridge door clicking] - Eric will be in his room sometimes, and I'll walk in when I'm putting his laundry away, and I see that my child has tears in his eyes, and when I ask my child what's wrong, he just breaks down, and cries, and says that he misses his dad.

[animal squeaks] And he wants his dad to come home, and that he misses him.

- Mm, papa.

- Yeah?

- Yep, my dad.

[Biana mmhmms] - [Biana] Mm, your dad, it's me and your dad.

- He shaved his mustache?

- Thank God.

- He went away when I was two.

And from what I remember, we had a lot of fun together.

Even though he's still in prison, he just wants me to like, have a good life.

[gentle hopeful music] [birds chirping] [gentle hopeful music] [no audio] - I like doing this because it kinda is relaxing, it gets stuff off my mind.

With sketching, it's like, am I doing it correctly, duh-duh-duh-duh?

So, this sketch can either [laughs] come out as cotton candy, or a ice cream.

So, it just kind of matters, the process.

[no audio] I was three, four, or five when he went away, I don't know the exact.

Here's me, and my mom, even my dad.

[object clinking] This is one of my favorite pictures, 'cause we're both smiling And this is a jail photo.

[no audio] They're not my favorites to look at, but it's like, I still like it, 'cause I spent time with my dad.

[object clunks and clinks] - I don't think she really understood at first.

How do you tell a three, four-year-old that her dad is, you know, in prison?

That, you know, daddy's not gonna be home for a while?

And she cried, and she cried for like weeks, every night.

It took a long time for her to get over that stage.

And she started understanding, you know, where he was.

But I think even to this day, you know, it's like, what, going on eight years?

It still bothers her, I see like, a lot of times, when she's on conversations with him and stuff, that she gets like, she tries to hold it in, and that's that strength coming, like, she tries to be so brave, but I know it hurts her, and that she misses him a lot.

[water sloshing] - I used to think that kids, if I ever, like, told them, they wouldn't wanna be my friends anymore.

You can't judge a kid for what their parent did.

[gentle hopeful music] [water sloshing] [utensil clicks] [Lyric mmhmms] [ball thumping] [gentle hopeful music] [person speaks indistinct] [ball thumping] - Mm!

My mom, she call like, almost every day, almost every day.

[ball thumping] - Hey, what's going on, ma?

- [Parent] Oh, that's Ant!

Oh, I got a 30-year-old, crazy.

[Anthony laughs] I forgot I got a old man in my house.

[Anthony laughs] Oh brother, Ant!

Don't try to make me old- - That's right- [indistinct] - [Parent] Age 30, almost?

- [laughs] Almost.

[parent speaks indistinct] - 29, you almost there.

[Anthony laughs] - WHere's dude at?

- [Ant] He's right here, he's playing.

- [Nnadji] What is that?

[ball thumping] [Anthony laughs] - Hello?

- I can't wait to see you tomorrow.

Too bad I can't grab you and spin you around, because you're too big.

I think because you're- [Anthony speaks indistinct] - [Parent] Just a little baby.

- And I'm not mad at my dad, or my mom, like my other siblings, I'm not mad.

I could be mad, but I don't choose to.

- [Parent] Most of my life, you know what I'm saying?

And the things I did?

The most innocent out of them got it second to most, and that's my kids.

Shoot, I can't do that stuff.

- Yeah.

[parent speaking indistinct] - Thank you for using Street.

- Call back- [indistinct] - I love you.

- Love you!

- By the age of 10, I knew a lotta stuff that, you know, a normal 10-year-old wouldn't know.

Like, why is my, well, I've seen my father and my mother.

Why they not in my life?

Why you only hear my grandma?

And my grandma never hid nothing for me, she said, this is how it is.

I already knew, I already knew.

I knew that, you know, drugs was a part of they life, a big part of they life, and it was taking them away from me.

But I didn't know how to cope with it.

I didn't know how to really deal with it.

[people chattering] You'll always need somebody to talk to, especially in like a physical form.

Before anybody.

[people speaking indistinct] - I just thank God for my grandma.

And my aunt, she's 63 years old, anything could be for this.

Who's next?

My mother's incarcerated, who's next?

Who's going, I asked her?

That's why I had to get myself together, that's why.

[Anthony sniffling] [kids whimpering] - [Family Member] You're all right.

[warm hopeful music] [footfalls crunching] - [Anthony] Don't ever think that you alone in some things.

If you feel like [warm hopeful music] you going through some stuff, come talk to me, all right?

- Okay.

- You don't have to build up that barrier, you could always express it, you know, to somebody, and you can come to me, [warm hopeful music] 'cause I've been through that already, you know?

You my brother, bruh.

[Nnadji speaking indistinct] - Ant, and when he looks at me, he said, he sees him when he was little.

[warm hopeful music] I guess I'm him when he was little.

And he's me in the future.

[footfalls tapping] [warm hopeful music] - As he was getting older, and he started asking where his dad was, in the beginning, I would tell him that dad's at work, that dad works in a different state, and that he's on his job, he's working, but he should be home soon.

I think it was two years ago.

When we went into the visiting room, the CO said, visit for inmate, and Eric looked at me, he's like, inmate?

And I'm like, oh lord.

I'm like, no, no, no, he's like, what?

[kids shouting] We just didn't understand how to tell you, because you were so young, like, we just felt that you wouldn't understand.

- I wouldn't say it made me feel angry, but I was surprised.

- One day, we'll sit him down together, the two of us, and we'll explain everything to him.

[phone ringing] - Hello?

- This call is from- - Vadim.

- An inmate at a federal prison.

This call is being recorded, and is subject to monitoring.

Hang up to decline the call, or to accept, dial five now.

If you wish to block any future calls of this nature- [phone beeps] - Hello?

- Hello?

- Hi.

- Hey babe, [speaking foreign language].

- Good, how are you?

- [Vadim] I'm all right, how is my boy doing?

- Here you go.

- Hello?

- [Vadim] Hey baby boy!

- [Speaking foreign language.]

- [Vadim] Good, how are you?

- I'm good.

- That's good, that's good.

So, listen, are you ready for some "Football" tomorrow, or what?

- [Eric] Yep!

- [Vadim] Yeah, Eagles playing San Francisco.

- I get to text with him about every day.

You want me to read some?

All right.

One says, "Good morning, buddy, how are you, sir?

You ready for some football?

Yeah, Ravens play tomorrow, I think they will win.

Write me, let me know what you, what you're doing."

[ball tapping] Ever since, like, my mom and my dad lived together, like, he would love the topic of "Football," and like, he wished, like, when I, like, grew up, I would talk about "Football."

[gentle hopeful music] His wish came true.

My dad's favorite team is the Eagles and the Ravens, just like me, [gentle hopeful music] 'cause we like the same teams.

He watches them with me.

I mean, he like, he watches them at the same time.

Yeah, when my father [gentle hopeful music] comes home, I'll be 14.

And I just have to sit and wait, be patient about it.

I understand.

[gentle hopeful music] [hair rustling] [gentle hopeful music] - You get to talk to daddy today, he'll see you, huh?

- Yeah.

[Monica laughs] [water sloshing] [gentle hopeful music] Mommy?

- Yeah.

- What time is it?

- 11:55.

- Okay.

- I'm getting it now, [mmhmms] okay?

- 'Kay.

[Monica laughs] [footsteps tapping] [computer taps] You can be far, far, far, far, far away, but as far as you are, I'm still gonna love you, and you're still gonna love me.

- Hey mama, what's up?

[Monica laughs] - Hey, nothing.

- What you doing, beautiful?

- Nothing, I just ate.

- You just ate, what you ate?

- I ate a breakfast sandwich.

I wanted to show you my painting.

Lemme show you.

It might break up, but- - Ah, you good right now - Okay.

So, this my painting.

[object crunches] [paper rustling] I made a ice cream cone.

- [Strollen] That's cute, mama, you do that?

- Yeah.

[paper rustling] - I ain't know you be doing all that.

Yeah, I know we used to color together, I ain't know you was, you coulda set your game up like that.

[Strollen laughs] [static taps] - Mom.

- Did it cut off?

- [Lyric] Yeah.

[no audio] [static taps] - It logged- - Hey, welcome back.

- [Monica] It logged her out.

- Yeah, it do that sometimes, this joint, they still trying to figure it out.

How old, how tall are you now?

- 5'1".

- Yeah, you on, you, yeah, you almost up there, I'm 5'7", you almost up there.

I'm getting old and washed up daddy, you hear me?

41 going on 17.

- That's not how it works.

[laughs] - Yeah, I wish it did.

So, why I don't get no emails from my daughter?

- Because I be busy.

- All right, all right, stay busy.

I'mma tell you to, I'mma tell you the same thing, I'm busy.

- You would never do that.

- You better believe it.

I miss my baby, he don't want, it'll be over soon, you hear me?

- Yeah.

- [Strollen] It'll be up before you know it, daddy be out there, getting on your nerves.

- Yep.

[Strollen laughs] - Well, I love you, if this thing cut off on you, 'cause you know it cut off once, so you never know.

- I love you too, and I miss you too.

- [Strollen] I'mma be all right, don't forget it, don't forget it.

- [Lyric] Mom, it hung up.

- [Monica] Mm, hon, that was the 45 minutes.

- Yeah.

[gentle droning music] - Nnadji, you ready?

- Yeah!

- Okay, get ready to go.

[gentle droning music] You had your shower already?

- What?

- Oh, okay.

[gentle droning music] [water sloshing] [toothbrush rustling] - The morning is so beautiful, because it's so quiet, it's so nice.

[gentle droning music] You can think about stuff.

How myself, can I do better?

And how will I do better?

[gentle droning music] If everything could go right, just how I planned.

I'm only 10, but I think a lot of stuff, and I know a lot of stuff for my age.

[gentle droning music] Oh.

[laughs] Morning.

- How are you?

- I'm good.

- Good to see you.

- You too.

- All right.

[gentle droning music] [door humps and clunks] [seatbelt clicking] [gentle droning music] [engine humming] [door clicks] [gentle droning music] - [Anthony] Hey!

- [Nicey] Hey man.

- [Ethel] How are you?

[family members laughing] You can feel it.

[gentle droning music] Oh man.

[people speaking indistinct] [family members laughing] [gentle droning music] - [Nnadji] I miss you, pop.

- [Nicey] Okay, so let me ask you a question.

So he says, all right, we put everything together, and you can get out, what then?

- [Ethel] I would not take you from somewhere knowing I can't feed you, [paper rustling] I can't clothe you, I can't treat you properly, or none of that.

I wouldn't dare do that.

- That sounds fair, right?

- What?

- [Nicey] To stay at the house until your mother gets situated, and settled?

- I would like that.

[Ethel mmhmms] - [Nicey] Right.

- No, it's not, it's not- - It's no animals in there?

- [Nnadji] It's not in none of these.

- [Ethel] I hope you didn't come here to cheat me this morning, I'm telling you now.

[objects clicking] Hey y'all!

- No, it weren't.

[popper clicks] [Ethel laughing] - [Nnadji] It be fun in the jail, just spending the time with her, playing games with her.

[popper clicks] Leave it- - There it go.

It's important that you know, dude, that none of this is your fault.

You knew that, right?

[Nnadji mmhmms] Great.

[popper clicks] [popper clicks] Mm, look at that.

- That's what I used to do, beat up on myself about why my parents, and stuff was gone.

If you think it was because of me, but it really wasn't.

Over a few years, took me three years or two years to know that, to figure that out.

[gentle droning music] Now, I know how to handle it, I know how to control my emotions now, about my parents.

[gentle droning music] Sometimes I think about them.

Think about them for a few minutes.

All right, call them, speak to them.

[gentle droning music] Get off the phone with them, then I just go on about my day.

- [Ethel] I'm glad you're my son, you a good kid.

Y'all ready to go?

[gentle droning music] - Yeah.

- Ooh.

- Love you.

- Love you.

- [Ethel] I'll miss you, all right?

- Okay.

- See you.

[family member smooches] [person speaking indistinct] [gentle droning music] [door clicks and squeaks] [person speaks indistinct] [gentle droning music] [hopeful string music] - And I'm just gonna [hopeful string music] think positive, and I just gotta think the forward, so ,yeah.

Come on, boys.

[TV chatter indistinct] - 'Cause I love him so much.

[hopeful string music] - Hmm-hmm, are you looking all the way around?

[warm hopeful music] - [Lyric] I always just think about it as I'm still gonna have a connection with my dad, no matter what.

[warm hopeful music] - Huh?

- Cotton candy, and look at this, what do you mean?

[Monica laughs] - I'm gonna go- - You can sleep there.

- Unicorn.

- And this is- - Unicorn.

[Monica laughs] [warm hopeful music] - [Worker] Here, there's cotton candy in the unicorn.

- Thank you.

- But that's on there, you can make a good one.

- Thank you.

- Uh-huh.

- [Director] Do you have any advice for kids [warm hopeful music] who are just starting to go through this?

- You have to keep strong even though I know it's probably hard.

[warm hopeful music] Never feel like, 'cause they are gone, they don't love you.

They were caught up in something, and it's not your fault, [warm hopeful music] it's not my fault, it is not none of the kids that have to go through this' fault.

[warm hopeful music] - Yeah, that's a really hard time, and I am going through that hard time as well.

But stay strong, be positive, think forward, [warm hopeful music] think the positive, and one day he or she will come back.

- Just think of all [warm hopeful music] the good memories you had with them.

Always love yourself, always love your parents.

Be grateful for the things [warm hopeful music] you have, even though your parents is in jail right now, that don't mean they forgot about you.

That don't mean they don't want you to come visit.

[warm hopeful music] That don't mean they don't want hugs and kisses.

That don't mean they purposely wanted to miss birthdays, and stuff.

And you, and I'll say you're not alone, 'cause all of us, [warm hopeful music] we've been through the same thing.

You're not alone.

You're right here with us.

We got you, we got you.

[warm hopeful music] [warm hopeful music] [warm hopeful music] [warm hopeful music] [logo whooshes and rustles] [warm music sting] [warm upbeat music] [triumphant music flourish]